WACKY WEDNESDAY: May Your Daze Be Wacky and Bright
And may all your Christmases be warped...
It’s that holiday time of year again, when the magical sounds of jingle bells, flying reindeer, the laughter of children and the alarmed voices of Fox News anchors bellowing about the “War on Christmas” fill the air.
And yes, there’s the music.
Here are five of my favorite traditional Christmas songs I love to listen to while roasting chestnuts on an open fire.
Or whipping the elves.
In the true sharing spirit of the holidays, I’d like to share some of my fondest heartwarming Christmas melodies.
Let’s start with this sentimental favorite from Angry Johnny & The Killbillies, “Six Bullets for Christmas”
I found this gem on the 2004 album A John Waters Christmas, which fans of the Pink Flamingos director is an indisputable treasure trove of twisted Christmas joy. I know absolutely nothing about the group Rudolph & The Gang. I’m pretty sure it’s not Rudolph Giuliani, BUT I CAN’T SWEAR TO THAT!:
I blame my fellow retired journalist and fellow KSFR dj Mark Oswald for this next one. Thirty-some years ago when we worked together, Oswald turned me on to the band called The Rockin’ Guys, who like him, were from Arkansas. “Eggnog” to this day remains my favorite punk-rock Christmas song:
Here’s a sexy little Yuletide number from Kay Martin & Her Body Guards. Kay’s 1962 album I Know What He Wants for Christmas … but I don’t know how to wrap it is full of songs like these:
If you told any of the artists listed above that you thought their song was “funny,” I’m sure that they would say “Thank you.” It’s obvious they wanted you to laugh.
But for die-hard fans of demented Christmas music, sometimes the funniest numbers are the ones that weren’t intended to be funny. I know, I know, our grade school teachers taught us that it’s good to laugh with people but it’s not nice to laugh at them. I guess I’m just evil, but I find this next overwrought, maudlin holiday dirge by an act known as Linn & Linda with The Jordanaires and Millie to be incredibly funny.
I’m pretty sure I downloaded this from the now-defunct WFMU Beware of the Blog (Here’s a Wayback Machine Link) The song raises an important question. No, it’s not why was this even allowed to be recorded. It’s WHAT THE BLEEDING HELL ARE THE JORDANAIRES DOING HERE????!??!?! In case you ditched that day in your Rock ‘n’ Roll History Class, they’re the vocal group that backed Elvis on who knows how many songs — not to mention Patsy Cline and several other country and rock stars. How did Linn & Linda get the Jordanaires????
Now, if these songs left you longing for more holiday madness, check out this similar post I did on my old blog a couple of years ago.
And if you’re a real fanatic, check out several hours of crazy carols on the Christmas episodes of my old music podcast The Big Enchilada.
Merry Christmas, pendejos!
